I've always loved being a girl. When I was little I loved it because I liked the color pink, I loved wearing dresses and dressing up all fancy, I loved my dolls, and I loved all things girly. But as I have gotten older I've realized that gender is so much more than that. Some people struggle with embracing their gender identity; I realize that.
So we're gonna take a look at God's design for gender roles, why gender even matters, what to do when you wonder why God made you the gender you are, how to not only be content with your gender, but to fully embrace it, how to understand that God has a better design than we could ever make, and knowing that God didn't make a mistake when He made you the gender you are, but He made you that way on purpose!
I know this is a VERY hot topic these days, and I acknowledge that as a Christian taking her beliefs from the Word of God, most people might not agree with me. I'm not expecting you to just take everything I say and agree or disagree with them, but I hope that you will take everything I say and test it to the ultimate source of truth, God's Word.
I also want to point out that just because I might disagree with you, that doesn't mean I hate you! I genuinely care about and love people, even if we disagree. I want people to hear the truth, but not so that they would agree with me! I want them to know the truth so that they can have hope and live a life that is fully glorifying to God and fully thriving in Christ!
WHY DOES GENDER MATTER?
Why even talk about this? Does it really matter what gender you are? According to the world, we can dress however we want, date whoever we want, marry whoever we want, and raise our kids to be "free thinkers" (I put this in quotation marks because really they're not free to think whatever they want. They are forced to lay aside any "religious" ideas and think only of themselves and what they want most.) But this is NOT what we see in God's word. Gender does matter. How do I know that?
Let's dive in:
Genesis 1:27 "So "God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; MALE and FEMALE He created them."
Right from the first chapter in Scripture we see that God made 2 very different, very distinct genders. God is all-powerful and very creative. He could have chosen to make us genderless, or with the choice of which gender we want to be. But He didn't. He knew His design was best, and if He left the choice up to us, we would end up in a mess (as we can see in the world today). God's design is clear, and it is beautiful. Right from the beginning of time God made 2 genders, and those still stand today. We haven't "evolved" into multiple different genders now. God's design still stands. Therefore, when we reject God's design for gender and say gender doesn't really make a difference, we are saying that what God made wasn't right and beautiful. We are making fun of our Creator and His design. We are saying we know better than God, because He chose to create genders, but we really don't need them.
Genesis 2:23 "Then the man said, 'This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.'" When God created the 1st woman, it was obvious that she was not a man. She was different. She was still human. She is still made in God's image. But she is set apart and is distinct from man. God created men to represent His strength, authority, and humility. And He created women to represent His peoples beauty, grace, and obedience. Therefore, we can conclude that gender IS important, because you have a calling and a purpose to represent to the world the beauty of the Gospel, and you do this by living according to God's design for your gender. Femininity and Masculinity are marvelous things, they are not hateful or harmful.
Genesis 2:24 "Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh." Gender is also important because it is the foundation upon which God created marriage. God created 2 genders to go perfectly together so that they can represent the Gospel in a marriage. Marriage is created by God, and it is His design for us to experience love, intimacy, friendship, and ultimately a closer relationship with Him. It is also God's way of bringing children into the world and teaching men and women how to selflessly serve one another.
Even the punishments God gave Adam and Eve after the 1st sin were different because of their genders. God created women to be the ones to bring life into this earth, but when sin entered the world, childbirth became painful.
GOD'S DESIGN FOR GENDER
So what is God's design that I keep talking about? Let's see what God's word has to say about the different roles of men and women:
MEN: In a marriage, the mans role is to be the husband and father. His role and responsibility in this is to lead his family in the truth, to protect and care for his family, and to selflessly love and even be willing to give up his life for his family. In relation to the gospel, men represent Christ's selfless love and His strength in leadership. Godly men are called to have integrity, to be upright, to follow the Lord, to have a pure heart, to be firm in the faith, to be diligent, to be faithful, to be patient, and to be humble.
WOMEN: In a marriage, the woman's role is to be the wife and mother. Her role and responsibility in this is to support, help, and respect her husband. And she is also called to teach, love, raise, nurture, and care for her children. In relation to the gospel, women represent the beauty, meekness, and obedience of God's people. Godly women are called to be gentle, to be wise, to be kind, to work willingly, to be generous, to be dignified, to be modest, to put God first and have no idols in their heart, to fear the Lord, and to be virtuous.
Now just because I used the example of the different roles in marriage does not mean that if you are not married your gender doesn't matter or you don't have to follow these roles. But marriage is a big picture of what each gender role and purpose is and how they work together.
Though each of these gender roles are distinct and different, they are of equal value and importance. Both men and women are fearfully and wonderfully made. Both men and women are made in the image of God. Both men and women can be saved. Christ died for ALL. God uses both men and women to further His kingdom. Both godly men and godly women are called to love and obey Jesus and surrender their hearts and lives to Him.
WHY DID GOD MAKE ME THIS WAY?
Do you wonder why God made you the gender that you are? Why didn't He make you the opposite gender? What if you wish you were a different gender. Is that feeling/desire from God?
Well, the truth is God makes no mistakes. And the truth is also that God made you. Therefore, you are not a mistake. So if God made you on purpose, He must have had a purpose for you and the way that He made you. You can be sure that God has a plan for your life, even when it's hard to see. And He also knows what's best for you.
You are God's masterpiece. Be content with how God made you and live in the design that He has called you too! And if it is hard, seek His strength!
HOW TO EMBRACE GOD'S DESIGN FOR YOU
How can we embrace the gender role God has given us?
Embrace means to support, accept, adopt, or take up something.
So the 1st step towards embracing God's design for your gender is to live out the role He has for you. Look to His word to see what it says about the role and responsibility of a brother, sister, son, daughter, mother, father, husband, wife, and friend. Look back at what I wrote the different roles of men and women are and look up Scripture that talks about this. Then begin to pray that grow the characteristics of what He is calling you to in your life.
Then, choose to be content and grateful for how God has made you. Choose to trust that God knows best.
And lastly, be wise and pure with how you interact with others. Maybe that means if you're a girl, you need to start dressing more modestly. Or maybe you're a guy, and you need to start leading your family instead of neglecting your duty. The way we interact with our family, church, friends, strangers, those of the same gender, and those of the opposite gender should always be glorifying to God and edifying to us!
May you glorify God by embracing His design for you!
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